Perhaps this post is a little late in the year, but its main idea can be applied to any time of the year as far as crossdressing is concerned. Like many, when I really started improving my dressing, I longed for a pair of high heels. There is just something about these shoes that presents such an air of grandeur.
When I finally got my first pair a couple of years ago, I was ecstatic! This excitement culminated with my first time strutting around the apartment wearing this newly acquired footwear but gradually dwindled as my feet began to hurt. The initial awe was further deflated as I realized how very difficult it is to walk in high heels.
Adding to my now fading happiness was the fact that most of the gorgeous shoes for women from the best brands stop at either size 11 or 12. So, with pain on the mind, the prospect of relearning a basic activity (walking), and the scarcity of cute shoes, what’s a t-girl to do?
To my surprise and delight, the answer came from my habit of people watching — I usually observe what females my age are wearing in order to get some fashion inspiration. What I noted was astounding, and can certainly fly under the radar if you’re not paying attention.
(Most) young women wear flip-flops! Once I realized this, it befuddled me that I didn’t see it before. Of course, warm weather plays a large factor and I had recently survived a brutal Chicago winter — but once the weather improved, there it was. On a daily basis, either going to class or scuttling off to the grocery store, females all around me were ditching the heels and wedges for the simplicity of a flip-flop.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not demonizing high heels , as they are still among my favorite fashion pieces. I just want to twist your perspective for a moment and get you thinking in a way you may not have before.
Sure, when it comes to special events and evenings out, many women are going to slip on some great looking shoes even if they make their feet feel like they are being squeezed in a vice grip. However, I think you’d be surprised to learn that even genetic girls struggle with walking in heels.
During my college graduation, I vividly recall seeing a gorgeous young lady in full regalia, making her way to the arena where the ceremony was being held. As I observed her, I noticed something very strange — she wasn’t walking gracefully but rather like she had been drinking — a lot. Of course she hadn’t, it was just that she had little experience walking in heels.
I smiled brightly as she gripped the guy she was walking with to maintain some sort of distorted balance, and at the same time felt a bit relieved. Because this girl who appeared to have it all together (appearance wise) could barely make her way across the parking lot, I understood something that would help me in my own journey.
Though the lesson wasn’t completely learned that day, over time I’ve discovered that being a MTF transgendered person doesn’t have to involve memorizing new mannerisms and relearning basic motor skills. If you choose to walk, talk or gesture in a more feminine way then more power to you, and I say go for what makes your life more enjoyable. For my part, there are definitely some aspects of femininity (as I perceive it) that I really gravitate toward and aspire to emulate.
However, please always remember that you should do what is right for you. Many of you have communicated these same feelings with me either via comments or e-mails and I applaud you for being true to yourselves. Being feminine can mean so many different things and is almost always in stark contrast to the typical male depiction of what it should be.
Keeping this in mind, wear what you want, walk how you want and talk how you want, but don’t do it because you think it’s required, do it because it makes you happy. Now get out there and strut your stuff, whether it be in a 5″ stiletto or a boring pair of black flip-flops (like the ones I wore at Be-All )