Los, Angeles (JWNN) — Today, GLAAD President Jarrett Tomás Barrios announced that the organization will be holding open auditions for new letters to be added to the LGBTQIA acronym. The announcement was made shortly after a friendly game of croquet.
“Seven letters is just not enough,” declared Barrios, “we need to strive to show that the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Intersex and Asexual community can be pioneers in creating the longest acronym in the world.”
Among the early front-runners are C for Crossdresser, D for Drag Queen and P for Panty Wearer. GLAAD is also accepting write-in entries as this will be a month-long exhaustive search.
Not everyone is happy about this forthcoming change, however. “Look, I’m all for equality and inclusion, but I don’t particularly like having to pause for a breath before I’ve even finished saying an acronym. Isn’t the point to be concise,” asked local gay woman Trish Tablor.
GLAAD hopes that this can evolve into an annual “American Idol” style event, complete with celebrity judges and alphabet members striving for stardom.
“Let’s get creative, folks. I mean, there are 26 letters in the American English alphabet, but if we do a little creative thinking, we can slide in some Greek letters and maybe even a few hieroglyphic characters,” added Barrios.
X has already been ruled out, due to it’s negative associations in the adult entertainment industry. “We are appealing this decision,” said X’s agent.
Stay tuned for the results!
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow. At first, at the beginning I thought it was serious. Thank god. It’s the things that are so far fetched you almost believe them that are the funniest.
Ha.
I enjoyed the laugh. Angie
American English????????????
I know we are said to have a different language in common, but it is still English, it’s just that you guys can’t it spell right
Spot on, Sweetie! Loved it!